"You"

You.

You make my life hurt.

I make my life hurt.

The End.
End?

© J. Foulston

"For the Man I Once Thought I Loved"

For the man I once thought I loved,

I do not.

I loved the possibility.

I fought for something I wasn't sure I wanted.

I fought too long

For what felt like nothing in return.

I still hurt thinking about it.

But why?

At your longing for something more?

Or for my longing for something more?

In the end

I know we will never be 

and

Know we had no hope at being.

I do not want an us.

I want each to find what is needed.

Good Bye.

Good Luck.

Good.


© J. Foulston

"My Front Steps"

My front stairs have been crying out for attention since I moved in almost 2 years ago. Sad and gray, beaten and downtrodden, they needed some TLC.

So this last week I have been working on them steadily. Last summer I had purchased my biodegradable cleaner and natural semi-transparent stain. This summer I finally had the time to use them.

Step one involved dusting off dirt on Friday, wetting down stairs and nearby plants, and brushing on the cleaner with my rubber gloves. Waiting 20 minutes, scrubbing with a stiff bristled brush, then "power washing" the cleaner and dirt off. I just purchased a new garden hose attachment with a jet option. It worked pretty good, getting the left over dirt and rocks out of the crevices I couldn't muster with my trusty steak knife beforehand.

Then came the 24 hours of drying time and bringing out the 80 grit sandpaper to help the stain adhere and to remove more stains the cleaner just couldn't get through. I actually saw beige come out from under all that patina.

After dusting all the sanding dust away, then I used painter's tape to keep my stairs protected from the solid stain I decided I was using for my risers. 

I felt a different colour on the risers was needed. So bring on the solid stain with a white base I had tinted the colour I wanted. A yellow to match the yellow trim on my front door.

Next, it was time to stain the steps. I knew the rain was due to come and I wanted to get the stairs protected before it came. I was just hoping the rain would hold off long enough. I managed to get two coats required on, with the waiting an hour in between needed. But the last coat on the last step was complete at 9:30 pm. The can said it only needed 1-2 hours dry time before rain or dew. Unfortunately, we had a torrential downpour. 

Before the rain it was a little less orangey...

10 hours of work on Saturday, in fear of Sunday's rain, and I completely forgot I could have tarped my stairs until it was too late. Fingers crossed the stain had enough time. Monday came with some sun and mostly clouds. By today, the stairs didn't look so bad. The "natural" stain I had bought, I guess meant natural cedar. So semi-orangey it is. Today I took the luxury of the sun and trying to finish up before the rain was to come again tonight by doing the stenciling I had intended.

Saturday evening I made my own stencils, having an idea of what I wanted, but knowing I wouldn't be able to find them ready made. So I took to the internet and googled images, zoomed in with my trusty mac to the size I preferred, traced the images with pencil and regular white paper, which I then taped down onto thicker paper (a.k.a. paint chips from my jaunt to Home Depot), and cut the images out with my lovely exact-o-knife.

The stenciling began. Of course the edges always get blurry as the paint seeps under, so I did the best I could, then brought out the number 2 artist brush and touched up things, making them more defined. And viola, my stairs completed...

 

All latex stain, easy clean up, low VOC, lots of tools for this little job. I used a small can of the latex rustoleum espresso paint for the stenciling. The same paint I intend to use to darken up my rails a bit. When we have more sunshine to work with.

I did notice a lot more ants in the front of my house now. I suppose they have been thrown off by the Raid in their hill. However, I think they are finding a new home under my stairs. I also noticed red ants where I haven't seen them before. New mission, if I choose to accept it, end these ants before they end me.

On the bright side, I finally received my cheque from the Provincial Government and City for my post-energy retrofit. A sweet $1568 to put on my line of credit, or course until I need to take that back and pay off my credit card.

Now, I really need to deal with my backyard, where the weeds are literally taller than me. A little neglect and lots of rain and sunshine, have made even more of a jungle out of my backyard.

"The Ant Hill"

My lot has been overrun. Just as the weeds have overtaken the backyard, so have the ants...

The Ant Hill...

A foot high and at least two feet wide, if not more...

The Ant Kill...

A whole can emptied. We shall see. Hopefully not see...

"My Front Yard"

Been out in the front yard all afternoon. Been moving plants around to where they'd do better with the light available. Transplanting a few plants from the backyard and decorative stepping stones from back as well. The other day there was a little boy so excited by my front yard and hopping from stepping stone to stone, I figured I'd make it a bit easier for him.

My birdbath I purchased two days ago...

My Garden Gnomes, tethered to my tree this afternoon to throw off any drunken attempted theft...

And my front door, with my new mail box finally put up. Thanks Owen for that drill. The mail box had originally had a silver top and label, but I spray painted them copper when I was refurbishing my railings.

I also planted those pots two days ago. Bought some potting soil, plants, and the stand from Home Depot. They made a killing off of me this week.

My railings were black and rusted. Last summer I primed and painted the railings, with copper underneath, showing through a stippled brown. I was hoping for more of an espresso, but I couldn't find a small can of rustoleum in that colour. I found one this week, so I'll likely update my railing with a little darker colour to match my door handle. Fingers Crossed.

Step 1: Sand off rust and prime.

Step 2: Copper.

Step 3: Stipple on Brown (Soon to be Espresso).

Next steps (no pun intended) are to clean the patina off my front stairs and stain them so the wood is protected from all the moisture. I'm contemplating cleaning the steps now at 8 pm. We'll see...

"Craft Time Again"

A Trip to Zellers proved craft inspiring...

Magnetic Dry-Erase Board, complete with post-it notes and a pen when I need them...

In use...

Today was productive. Last day of Mom visiting, up at 7 am. Home Depot bound. Spent a pretty penny. I finally have time to finish up my front yard. Added some flower pots to my front steps, bird bath, moved decorative stepping stones from the backyard to front. Tomorrow I plan to replace a dying plant, move a couple plants around, and plant two new perennials I bought today. 

I forgot to mention, the garden gnomes. Every garden needs a garden gnome! I'll post pics tomorrow.

"Garage Apartment Update"

Well, got a call from my contractor today. Heard back from the City. We applied back in April, now July and...they said no. But we are going appeal. They had issues with the suite entrance stairs being in the backyard, and that my lot size is fairly tiny, and the height being apparently 6" too high. I was reassured that it shouldn't be that big of a deal. Just more time to be taken.

That actually works out for me, now that I know more about the renewal of the Cornerstone's Secondary Suite grants. New applications will be accepted in 2013. They haven't finalized the requirements yet, nor the applications. This will give me time to deal with the City, and save some more funds or at least spread out the spending. The estimated cost was a shocker. Turns out in Old Strathcona, the services are accessible out of the front of the property, not the back. So they have to dig a trench in my backyard and break concrete in my basement to connect services. That added an extra $10 000. Right now power is run overhead from my house to the garage, but that's not allowed anymore. It has to be buried. Which is better actually, as the neighbour's mature trees have been known to touch the wires. Paid to get that cut back last year when I was doing the front yard's grade and landscaping. I'm still waiting on getting a fence between myself and the apartment building next door done, so that I can get a sidewalk done, but the dirt is settling which I need before I put something in permanent. At least the water is not running back towards the foundation anymore.

I haven't even broken ground on this plan, when I started thinking about the possibility of finishing the attic into a master bedroom and bathroom, and having to run stairs from main level up. This means a skylight would be needed, on the side that doesn't face the apartment building as I have enough windows looking my way. I'm crazy excited about this idea, but it all depends on the structure up there. Especially the type of trusses. But I want it! Of course, garage apartment first, likely backyard landscaping second, finishing basement and new basement bathroom and laundry room third, and then tackle the attic. All I know is that I will be house poor forever, and always have a project to work on, and I will love it all.

I haven't gotten any word on rebates I'm due from the provincial and municipal government for the energy efficient retrofit I did. I did get rebates from the feds and my mortgage insurer. I'll need to dig in a bit and check on this. Things are going, slowly, but it seems everything is happening for a reason.

The IKEA kitchen sale is back on until August 6th. I have to purchase the other half of my kitchen that wasn't available in February. Pay with my IKEA Credit Card and its deferred for 12 months.  I have to start paying for all the work Great Canadian did last spring. That was deferred for a year. Come September I have to start paying back $33 000. 

It is true what they say, the more money you make, the more money you spend. I've never been in debt in my life, and I guess here I am, but I think it's a responsible debt. My home. Mine. My Love.